Are your vintage and antique pieces dusty and scruffy rather than shabby and chic? Put those mongrel collectables right with a sympathetic, lean, green, environmental clean.
Walnuts, pecans and other oily nuts can be used to disguise small scratches on wood. These hacks work for a variety of soft finishes on furniture — chair backs, tabletops and so on. It’s useless for sealed, hard lacquer: Sorry.
First of all break the nut open. And pinching it in your fingers rub the flesh back and forth over the scratch in different directions, firmly enough to let the white snag into the scratch.
The oil in the nut will plump the wood fibres, the oxidation of the oil will darken naturally, and the warming up of the surrounding waxes and oils will spread the original finish.
If the dent is deeper, pick up a packet of wax crayons for antique furniture and fill the mark in before refinishing it with a light polish all over with something like beeswax polish.
Briwax and Libron sticks range from €10-€15 in a family of colours (pale to dark) — a brilliant addition to your restoration and cleaning kit.
For a regular polish for wood, two parts olive oil to one part lemon juice will leave a delicious scent on the air, worthy of an afternoon in Sorrento.
If you buy some old brown thing from the second-hand shop, and it’s just dulled, you can revive the original shine with a simple oil and vinegar wipe. The oil will sit up, and the vinegar will evaporate off — this is why they remain so safe in combination.
Use this cleaner for raw wood or second-hand pieces with a soft finish, that you’re not ready to paint or completely strip.
Don’t cloud them up with some cheap silicone furniture spray emblazoned with a honey bee. Never, ever over-wet wood, marble or any unsealed stone with water solutions. They are all porous.
Wood can swell, and marble will drink down the damp and stain — forever. With white marble, it’s over.
ADD VINEGAR TO THE MIX
Old wood furniture has its history written in its finish, and purists don’t want to lift this with heavy cleaning or sanding back.
Use about three-quarters of a cup of good oil, olive or walnut oil is ideal, blended with a quarter cup of white vinegar.
Using a soft, clean rag, dip and rub the solution over the wood, working in a circular motion to lift dirt and condition the wood.
The results can be surprisingly good, but will always leave some of the worst visible distressing, let’s call it “honest wear”, so flounce off and spruce up something else.
Old or new, chrome should have the flash of silver. That said, after 40-50 years, you can expect electroplated chrome to start breaking up under heavy use, showing pitting, flaking and rust. The only thing you can do now is to either stabilise it under a urethane coat or have the piece re-plated.
For robust chrome, start with a microfibre cloth, and rub any dirt off with a little dip in 1:1 water/white vinegar solution.
If you’re not getting results, add a dab of baking soda to the vinegar dip. Don’t use neat lemons or their juice on chrome — they are just too acidic.
Furthermore, don’t pick at the plating with your fingers-nails, use a soft, old toothbrush for detail and/or a wooden cocktail stick. Wipe dry immediately.
To slow oxidisation, some people do use carnauba car wax to seal the surface and add lustre, but wax can trap moisture.
Ensure the piece is bone dry before application. If you do go to wire wool, start slow with 000 grade pads and well crumpled aluminium foil, as chrome can scratch.
Ever noticed how easily tomato-based foodstuffs slip off pans? Tomato juice is acidic, relatively gentle and a superb cleaner, specifically for copper.
As we need a paste, you can reach straight for pure tomato paste (handy in a tube) or use good old cheap ketchup — a little runny but equally useful.
Ketchup is non-toxic and contains vinegar, giving it that extra bit of welly.
Just put a splotch on a clean soft rag and start over the surface of the unsealed copper piece in circular motions.
The tarnish should lift easily. Turn the rag over to tackle fresh spots.
If the oxidation is stubborn, spread your ketchup over the entire piece and let it sit for half an hour. You can even add a little salt for a mild abrasive hit.
It’s possible to clean vintage costume jewellery with ketchup too.
Squirt ketchup over the piece and let it sit for a while before rinsing off. Work the liquid cleaner into fine detail (not behind paste stones — these should always be kept dry) before cleaning with clear water, then drying and polishing with a lint-free cloth.
BRASS, BAKING SODA AND LEMON
Brass also responds well to a taste of ketchup, but I really like to make up a paste of baking soda (your green, clean, super staple) and lemon juice.
This hack works on bare brass, not lacquered brass, which will have to be stripped by a specialist.
Otherwise, just dump a couple of tablespoons of the soda into a bowl and add enough lemon juice by the teaspoon to make a cleaner with the consistency of toothpaste. This gives it a little heft under your fingertips to work into the alloy without damaging it.
Wearing light gloves to protect your skin from the acetic acid, try applying this to brass features in your period home, including light switches and door knobs.
You can put the paste into a small plastic food bag secured with an elastic band to sit on a handle or knob and then wipe it off after 20 minutes to half an hour.
Use a toothbrush to flick the white residue out of fine detail.
With brass and copper, always try a soap and water wipe first, then trial green mixtures on their base to see if there’s any lifting and shifting of the grot.
That balding vintage rug can retain its charm, even when damaged.
Wool and high wool blends are the best of the best in carpeting, as with their lanolin-rich fibres they are stain-resistant.
Wool also pulls in moisture and wicks it back to the atmosphere, gently managing excess humidity and air quality.
Going forward, there are certain key hacks for preserving those oriental and tribal beauties.
First of all, vacuuming. This is vacuuming on a low power without any beater bar to drag the weave and tufts of an old dear. Vacuum both sides of the rug, lifting it gently to an area you can easily work.
Don’t yank it around roughly by the ears. Front, then the back, Androw we need to rotate the rug.
It could be sitting in direct UV light (look what that’s doing to your face and the backs of your hands) or it could be in a traffic area — this evens out the inevitable wear.
Ignore those feverish bloggers. Do not throw fresh grass clippings or wet tea leaves at your antique or elderly rug, unless you’re intent on staining it.
Steaming creates too many real water droplets.
Some vintage carpets have been over-painted. Wait until that slap-on nightmare dilutes into the surrounding pile.
A shake of baking soda is generally all you will ever need to freshen, de-odorise and cheer up your carpet. Follow with a light vacuum.
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